torres

That’s Torr-n It For Kop

BEING humiliated in the Euro Plate final in front of just under 30,000 vaguely interested Liverpool fans or eternal glory by beating Brazil in...
colin-farrell-triage

For Pieter’s Sake Go To India

CRICKET: The usually reserved and self-conscious Kevin Pietersen has told his fellow England cricketers that if they don't go suckling at teat of the...
funny

BRITISH BALLERS

BASKETBALL: America's continuing quest to impose their made-up sports on the rest of the world continues with the news that reigning NBA champions the...
Ancelotti Guus

THAT'S YOUR LOTTI FOR THE SEASON

FOR those who missed it, the English Premier League season ended last week.Chelsea have completed a League and Cup double and Burnley, Hull and...
Cheryl-Cole-John-Terry

ENGLAND'S LOSS IS ENGLAND'S GAIN

AHA! We knew it! BBM said last week that having no English clubs in the Champions League semi-finals would help our World Cup campaign.Well...
john-portsmouth-football-club-westwood

A QUESTION OF PORT

PORTSMOUTH. What the fuck's going on there? Anyone else know?So they're relegated, close to not existing and struggling to put out a team because...

WOODS MASTERS THE ART OF SPIN

SINCE BBM went to print before the final round at Augusta, we've got no idea whether Tiger Woods managed to stop having sex for...
mr_t_blue

SEMENYA FORECAST'S RETURN

THE world's most famous hermaphrodite, Caster Semenya (left), is set to return to competitive action in Spain on 24 June. Semenya hasn't raced since...
fabio_capello_rueda_prensa

BARCELONA'S REAL DEAL

REPENT! Repent! The end is nigh! There are no English clubs left in the Champions League, the world as we know it is set...
Sir-Alex-Funny

ON THE RUN IN

IF there's one thing BBM loves more than hiding in the bushes round the back of Cheryl Cole's house with our cock out, it's...