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A Thorough Examination

LAST minute revision, writing notes on the back of your arm, sitting up late at night wanking over the girls in your class when...
nessa

Oh Brother, It's Back

THE usual motley crew of fame-hungry idiots entered the Big Brother house this week.And it's the usual hodge podge of knobheads - a bird...
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Katy Blasts Her Man

CLEAVAGE-TASTIC, man-voiced, Brand-shagger, Katy Perry, has decided to celebrate her fiance's birthday by giving us all a present. She's blasting Russell Brand into space....
Katie-Holmes

Katie Under Cruise Control

MORE madness from Scientology's main man, Tom Cruise. Unable to get his kicks from work, he's once again turned his attentions to meddling with...
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O’Brien’s A-Maze-D At Kiwi Visa No-No

RICHARD ‘Crystal Maze' O'Brien has been banging his bald bonce against a brick wall after being denied a visa to retire to New Zealand,...
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A Brit Too Far

WHEN it comes to women, BBM's standards are notoriously low. Just ask Susan Boyle. Little minx.And although she might be a not-as-hot-as-she-was nutjob who...
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Mum's The World Mariah

IT looks like Mariah Carey will actually have an excuse to get fat for once. The diva is reportedly sperminated with twins, after her...
Pigeon

Holy Fying Rat, Pakistan!

PIGEONS. Sky rats. Carriers of contagion and scourge of public art installations across the world.Well now we can add ‘treason' to their list of...
Nun

Crime Stopper Nun Uses Force

POSSIBLY the wimpiest thief in the world was stopped and subdued mid-pilfer by an elderly nun in Pittsburgh this week.Sister Lynn Rettinger, who has...
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Teen Wolves Know Howl To Dress

FIRST the good news. It seems vampire chic is finally on its way out as young impressionable minds finally start to realise that this...