THEY say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but probably not when
you are on a first date with a stutterer.
Dan, Bondi Junction
VICTORIA Beckham goes up to David and says: “I’ve just seen what’s in the
games room – why have you bought a coffin for me?”
He replies: “That’s not your coffin, it’s a case for my snooker cue.”
WHY wouldn’t Eva Braun give Adolf a blowjob?
He always left a Nazi taste in her mouth.
I’M really starting to hate these stupid little Russian Dolls.
They’re so full of themselves.
DID you know that diarrhoea can actually kill you? Even if you only drink a
I ALWAYS make the wife sleep on the wet patch.
It was her idea to buy a cheap water bed.
I USED to hate P.E. at school. I had a pretty big cock and was embarrassed
to take the group shower afterwards.
All the other girls just pointed and laughed.
I CAN’T believe it. Me and my wife were sitting watching TV when the
founder of Apple just walked into the house and took all our Mr Sheen!
Fucking Jobs, coming over here and stealing our polish.
I WAS in my garden relaxing when a passer-by called me “Scruffy council
I wanted to chase the idiot, but I tripped on a mattress and banged my head
on an abandoned washing machine.
THEY say, “Crime doesn’t pay.”
Well, I work in Cash Converters and apparently it does.
Rachel, North Sydney