I had sex with a yummy mummy at work today.
I love being an archaeologist. Jan, Bondi
I said to my mate, “The wife has been saying she wants a Threesome.”
He said, “Excellent stuff, what have you said to her?”
“I said if she can find two people desperate enough to fuck her, then she should go for it” Ron, St Kilda
“Have you done a sex video with your wife?” I said to my mate in the pub,
“Yeah of course!” he said,
“Me too!” I said “I’ve got an idea, when we get home, you send me yours, I’ll send you mine, we can knock one out then delete them. What do you say?”
“You’re on!” he said excitedly as he rubbed his hands together and hurried home.
That was a week ago. I’ve not spoken to him since.
Maybe he felt a bit awkward watching me fucking his wife? Dave, Paddington
I’ve just opened my sons credit card statement.
£566 on Internet porn.
Fuck, he’s going to kill me when he sees it. Ben, Kings Cross
I accidentally gave my girlfriend an STD.
We’re gonna name it Kevin. Derek, Darlinghurst
Why was the phone wearing glasses?
He lost is contacts. Anna, Tunbridge Wells
I saw a sperm whale last night.
Thats my wife when I spunk on her face. Fred, Manly
When I was growing up I was told I would amount to nothing so i became an IT technician because I heard there was a lot of cache in it. Frank, Richmond
For funny news click HERE