In possibly the only example of a meal were sprouts weren’t the worst thing on the plate, a bloke in Germany chowed down on some of the horrible veggies along with a side order of rump steak taken from the back of another man. Oh, and for starters, he had a side order of penis. From the same bloke.
Armin Meiwes became one of the most infamous cannibals in history after killing and consuming 43-year-old computer technician Bernd Brandes in 2001. Now the notorious man-meat muncher has described how he killed and ate his gay lover ‘with his permission’. Well that makes it OK then.
“I decorated the table with nice candles,” he said. “I took out my best dinner service, and fried a piece of rump steak – a piece from his back – made what I call princess potatoes, and sprouts,” he said.
“After I prepared my meal, I ate it. The first bite was, of course, very strange. It was a feeling I can’t really describe. I’d spent over 40 years longing for it, dreaming about it.”
“And now I was getting the feeling that I was actually achieving this perfect inner connection through his flesh. The flesh tastes like pork but stronger.”
After the pair met, they went to Meiwes’ isolated farmhouse, where they had sex. But, according to Meiwes, Brandes was not satisfied because “he wanted to be eaten alive”.
Brandes then swallowed 20 sleeping tablets with half a bottle of schnapps before Meiwes cut off his penis “with his agreement”, and fried it for them both to eat.
Meiwes later ran a bath for Brandes, and read a Star Trek novel while checking on him every 15 minutes. He eventually killed Brandes in the early hours of the morning, by stabbing him in the neck and then chopping him into pieces.
Disgusting. Who in their right mind reads Star Trek novels in this day and age?