There are signs that city centres may finally be returning to normal, as Nick Clegg is booed on a walkabout. John, Hillingdon
A spokesman for Christopher Nolan admits the viral marketing campaign for The Dark Knight Rises may have got out of hand. Rob, Kings X
I remember at dinnertime my parents would give me a knife and fork and I’d bang them on the table until the food was ready.
We were quite an incestuous family. Gary, Melbourne
You know you’re into some weird shit when the wife finds your porn collection and doesn’t even realise it. Trent, Paddington
Agoraphobia… the cure is out there. Rick, Darwin
My girlfriend and I went for a walk across a frozen lake last December whilst holidaying in Greenland.
She said, “Do you think the woman on the hotel reception is pretty?”
I said, “You’re walking on thin ice love.”
She said, “Ohh, rattled your cage, have I?”
And then she slipped through the ice and drowned.
What a hilarious misunderstanding. Kacey, Kensington
My mate just said to me, “If you became invisible, what would you do first?”
I said, “I’d go to Paris, find a performing street mime and beat him to death, the round of applause he’d get would be astounding.” Mike, Surry Hills
THE SUN , today page 7 , Adele’s hunting her perfect man …
“I’d also like a man that can cook “
Now there’s a fucking surprise. Aaron, Bethnal Green
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