Dead Girls Don't Say NoEver wanted to shag Cleopatra? And by Cleopatra we mean the ancient Egyptian queen who looked like a young Liz Taylor, not “Cleopatra” the shit and slightly chubby girl group from the 90s.

Well now’s your chance with the news that Egypt’s Islamist-dominated parliament is trying to introduce a law allowing husbands to have sex with their dead wives up to six hours after death.

Bloody freaks. It was weird enough when they used to wrap corpses in toilet paper and put them in pyramids – maybe after all that embalming they took the phrase ‘yummy mummy’ too literally.

“This is unbelievable. It is a catastrophe to give the husband such a right! Has the Islamic trend reached that far? Is there really a draft law in this regard? Are there people thinking in this manner,” lamented prominent journalist and TV host Jaber al-Qarmouty on air.

The “farewell Intercourse” bill was inspired by a Fatwa issued by a Moroccan cleric last year. Zamzami Abdul Bar said that since the two would meet in Heaven again anyway, death shouldn’t get in the way of one last post-mortem marital romp. It certainly adds another dimension to the phrase “having a stiffy”.

BBM has “farewell intercourse” on a regular basis – but only because the women we sleep with never want to see us again.

Egypt’s National Council for Women called on Parliament not to adopt this and other measures which they believe increasingly seek to roll back women’s rights.

The NTC further charges that “marginalizing and undermining the status of women would negatively affect the country’s human development.”
BBM doesn’t know what all those big words mean but it sounds like the women in Egypt are a right bunch of dirty minxes. Phwoar!

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