Liz Jones, a columnist for the UK’s Daily Mail newspaper, has all at once horrified, infuriated and amused the populace with her confession that she stole her partners’ sperm in an attempt to get pregnant.
In her article Jones – a shrivelled middle aged hack whose constant bitching about her love life, or lack of one, has miraculously kept her in a job for decades – admits that after sex she would take her ex’s used condoms into the bathroom and there “did what [she] had to do. Bingo.”
She goes on to warn any man wanting to move in with a woman in her late 30’s or early 40’s to “take it as read that she will want to use them to procreate, by fair means or foul, no matter how much she protests otherwise.” Because apparently, all women are as mental as she is. Erm?
The astonishment and fury caused by Jones’ confession on Thursday pushed her to the second most trended subject on Twitter, sparking a barrage of comments like our favourite from AlexReadings: “I wanna see Attenborough spear #lizjones through the face while riding a narwhal.” Now for that, I really would pay my TV licence fee.
By Rebecca Jones