image of load of bullFORGET beer, drugs and underage sex – the police in the quiet Hampshire town of Whitchurch are clamping down on Red Bull in a bid to curb antisocial behaviour from teenagers.

Police have asked the town’s shopkeepers not to sell Red Bull and other high-energy drinks after a mammoth ‘nine’ reports of misbehaviour in March. Jesus, sounds like it’s Mad Max down there.

“We have asked shops not to sell Red Bull or other stimulation drinks to under-16s on a Friday evening as it increases hyperactivity,” said a police statement.

The local force are now attempting to push through laws allowing them to open fire on any children found scrumping or riding bikes without protective headgear.