The police in Hong Kong received a rather peculiar phone call this week when a man phoned from LanTian Park claiming his penis was stuck in a bench.
When police arrived at the scene the man was in fact face and dick down stuck in the bench. Apparently the 41-year-old man thought it would be fun to attempt to have sex with the metal bench, however as he became aroused (that means he got a boner to you lot) his penis became stuck in the bench.
Paramedics tried to remove his penis from the bench, and even tried to drain some of the blood from it to free him, but his dadpole was just too swollen. So after four long hours, they decided to cut the bench free and take the man and his chosen sex slave to hospital.
Eventually cutting through the bench to remove it from the man’s weener, and said he was very close to losing his penis forever.
So the moral of the story is…try not to have sex with inanimate objects, although if you’ve really got to do it, try a pie, much easier on the shaft.
By Fanny Frangipane
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