Let’s face it, if Lionel Messi hadn’t been crocked for big chunks of last year, Real Madrid mincer Cristiano Ronaldo would never have won the Ballon d’Or title.
Ronaldo promised to celebrate his victory by buying each of Real Madrid’s team of physios a car of their choice. Because as we all know, there’s nothing like a show of needlessly lavish spending to prove how classy you are.
It was a promise that, a few months back, would have seemed fairly unlikely to need keeping. After all, Ronaldo trailed both Franck Ribery and Lionel Messi in the list of bookies’ favourites.
But a flurry of goals for club and country this season – culminating in a hat-trick against Sweden to send Portugal to the World Cup – changed all that, and the suspiciously camp star got the nod.
Apparently, the promise was made during one of the many long sessions that the Portuguese star was being treated on the physio table. If he was getting a happy finish at the time, we can understand why he did it – BBM has said all kinds of crazy things while in the throes of ecstasy. Things like “no, of course I don’t care that you haven’t shaved your legs” and “No, I promise you won’t have to wear the Cheryl Cole mask next time”.
It’s unclear if Ronaldo will give each member of the staff their own car or if they’ll have to carpool with one. In the past he has reportedly rewarded their contributions to keeping him fit and ready for underwear photo shoots with mobile phones, iPads and watches.

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