We all remember watching the metronome swing of Caster Semenya’s hidden testicles as she raced to an gold medal in the women’s 800m at the world championships in 2009. Not since Linford’s lunchbox have a set of genitals captured the imagination of athletics fans across the globe.
But while Semenya was eventually cleared of any penis-based advantage, the issue of hyperandrogenism is still hanging over the sport like a great big cloud shaped like a huge pair of hairy bollocks as we heard towards the Olympics.
Now we have some new rules to handle hyperandrogenism, which state that a female athlete’s serum testosterone levels must be below the male threshold. In other words, bollocks are banned from women’s events.
Frankly, this all seems a bit overcomplicated to us, especially after discovering that, in the 1960s, the International Association of Athletics Federations simply made athletes parade naked in front of officials to verify their sex.
Frankly, we think this a great idea and should be applied to tennis too. In fact, they should just a hidden webcam in the women’s showers like we did at our girlfriend’s house.
On another note, the playlist for the opening ceremony has also been released and it’s a weird old mix. Tracks include the Sex Pistols punk anthem God Save The Queen, the James Bond theme, Handel’s Music for Fireworks, Amy Winehouse’s Valerie and Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood.
Wouldn’t it make sense to get Lady Gaga over as well? Then we can do the testosterone probe on her too and BBM can win a bet with our mate Dave down the Cock and Bull.
Pies are a bit rich… click HERE
