Listen ladies, don’t bother wasting your time with these online dating sites – they kick all the best blokes off.
When we signed up to eHarmony, they were quick enough to take our money, but when we listed “anal” under “hobbies and interests” they were even quicker in booting us off the site.
So we feel a little bit of sympathy for former police officer Gilberto Valle after match.com decided to pull down his profile. And why? Simply because he likes to kill and eat women. Come on ladies, everyone has their faults. If you’re going to be that picky, you’ll never find Mr Right.
Valle, better known to the media as “the cannibal cop”, was convicted in March 2013 of plotting to kidnap, kill and eat women but was then acquitted in July and released from jail. According to several reports, he created a profile on match.com under the handle AmicableOne14, saying his favourite hobby was cooking. A clean record and good in the kitchen? What’s not to love!
“We received a number of complaints about this profile, alerting us to its existence, and have removed it from our site,” a spokesperson told New York Magazine.
In his purported profile, Valle said he was looking for a “non-judgmental” woman who is “a little kinky”, to which he added a smiley face. The profile listed the ideal date as someone who should “appreciate the simple things and can make the best out of a situation that is less than ideal”. “You’re non-judgmental. You can generally see the good in people and you are kind and generous,” it said. “You appreciate and laugh at bad jokes.” We’d hate to think what happens if you went on a date and didn’t laugh at his jokes.

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