FRAUDLEY Harrison has lost four of his last eight fights and the last time he entered the ring was beaten up by a 37-year-old Belfast cabbie – but amazingly he is still as cocky as ever and has made an astonishing attempt to goad David Haye into the ring.
It’s a bout which could only be staged in the desert as there is not an arena in the world big enough to fit their egos. 
We thought we’d seen the last of the A-Farce when he was dumped by Frank Warren last year, but he believes Haye owes him an opportunity, and doesn’t care if it ends their friendship.
“You say you want a challenge, well I know you David and I don’t think you really believe you can walk through me and take me out. I dare you to make this match,” he said before collapsing on the ropes with legs made of jelly.
Seeing as Haye actually tends to win his fights he is looking for world title fights, but Audley reckons he can nip in while talks stall with the Klitschko brothers and wants to teach the lairy Londoner some humility after he “took liberties” by trying to “blast him out” in a sparring session back in 2006.
So Audley wasn’t happy about being punched in the face by a cruiserweight? Just give up. Boxing just isn’t for you old bean.
• BEARDED
bore Sir Richard Branson (left) has revealed for the first time he “might be interested” in becoming involved in Formula One – and for one Max Mosley is very excited by the prospect of seeing a Virgin team taking a ride on a regular basis.
F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone confirmed Branson “would love” to take on the up-for-sale Honda Racing and the parties were Virgin on an agreement.
The broke team stunned the world of motor sport in early January when they announced their immediate withdrawal from F1.
It had been hoped a new owner would soon be found to allow Honda, in whatever new guise, to be on the grid for the season-opening race in Australia in a month’s time.
Judging by the success Branson has had running his trains, we doubt they will even start the races on time, reckon they will frequently break down and sometimes won’t even turn up at all.
Branson is rumoured to be unprepared to complete the deal unless he is guaranteed that all leaves will be swept from the tracks.
• MIGUEL Cotto turned his sights on Ricky Hatton and Manny Pacquiao after stopping battling-but-brutally-beaten Michael Jennings to win a welterweight world title for the third time.
Making his comeback from a first defeat to Antonio Margarito, the Puerto Rican produced a clinical display to knock Jennings down three times before the ref stepped in to call it off with 24 seconds left of the fifth round.
“The winner of the Hatton-Pacquiao fight, if they want to fight me, I’m here,” Cotto said.
The boys may be a bit busy on the oche, however, after it was revealed they would help promote their fight by playing darts at the Rover’s Return with Phil ‘The Power’ Taylor as referee and the loser getting the first round in. Pacquiao’s promoter Bob Arum said: “Ricky’s good at darts but Manny’s a whiz. My man won’t be paying for the beer.” Whatever the result, Fatton will buy rounds 2-30.
• THERE was good news and bad news for Kiwi amateur golfer Danny Lee last week. Good – he became the youngest ever winner of a European Tour tournament with a one-stroke victory at the Johnnie Walker Classic. Bad – as the 18-year-old is still an amateur he didn’t pocket a penny of the £400,000 prize money and, by comparing himself to Tiger Woods, he put a kiss of death on himself that guaranteed he’d never win another title and will be serving fries before he even ends his teeenage years. Strong work Danny boy.
LEGENDS LIVE
IMAGINE a new manager taking charge of Plymouth next week as they lie one place off the Championship relegation zone. Then imagine them winning the Championship next season, the Premiership the year after and the Champions League the year after that. And then retaining it.
Impossible, eh? Well it actually happened less than 35 years ago and it was largely down to one man – Brian Clough.
His heroics in taking Nottingham Forest from famine to feast will never be repeated and the late great still doesn’t really get enough credit for it.
This may be to do with the fact he was a twat. But while his drunkenness, bullying and gobshitery were detested by everyone outside his clubs he had the ability to make his own men run through walls for him.
A brilliant striker for Sunderland and Middlesbrough, Clough’s goal scoring record is almost as amazing as his managerial one, netting 251 goals in 274 games before his career was cruelly cut short by a knee injury at just 27.
But this just heightened his ambition to succeed as a boss and 10 years later he had guided a broke, unfashionable Derby side to the top tier title.
After a clash of egos with the board saw him leave Derby, and a brief spell at Brighton he took the job at Leeds – a club he had criticised his entire life.
His opening gambit to the players was this: “As far as I’m concerned you can throw all those medals you’ve won in the bin, because you won them all by cheating.” He lasted 44 days.
But in Forest he found a marriage made in heaven during 18 years of success.
As Clough said about the speed of Forest’s ascent to world beaters: “They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, but I wasn’t on that particular job.”
