Kids nowadays. With all these health and safety protocols, they can’t do a bloody thing. Back in BBMLive’s day, we’d happily ride our bike without a helmet straight into a speeding car. But those government bureau-prats have put a stop to such harmless fun.
Just ask charity fundraiser James Creighton of Stevenage in Hertfordshire. The poor git was told by police to take down his elaborate Halloween decorations, which he puts up every year to earn sponsorship money for charity. And for what petty reason? Well, apparently the sight of very realistic disembowelled corpses on his front lawn had made a child in the neighbourhood cry. Come on, people. When BBMLive was a kid our dad would regularly force us to look at corpses, and it certainly didn’t do us any lasting psychological harm – not according to our therapist anyway, who says the beatings were a much more likely cause.
“The police came round knocking on my door,” said Creighton. “They said they were sorry to disturb me, but they had a complaint from a member of the public who walks past my house in the morning. Apparently their child starts crying every time they walk past my house.
“I was shocked – more to the point that the parent couldn’t come to the door themselves and speak to me personally, but had to get the police involved and waste their time. All the other kids love it. It is just this one who doesn’t like it.”
Well said, Mr Creighton. Why should psychologically scarring a child for life get in the way of some harmless – some might say pointless – fun.
“It is a bit gruesome, it’s a bit gory, but that is Halloween,” said Creighton, who raised £1100 for charity last year. “It is meant to be fun and scary. It is all for a good cause.”
Coincidentally, we said exactly the same thing to Cheryl Cole when we broke into her bathroom last month. Sadly, she needlessly got the police involved too.
By Richard Gadsby
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