Cardiff City owner Vincent Tan’s unusual medical condition is worsening with doctors confirming he’s now just a cheap spray-tan away from turning into Swiss Toni from the Fast Show after a bizarre pep talk to the team involving metaphors about making love to beautiful women.
The Malaysian businessman visited the club’s training ground to give some advice to Russell Slade’s side after a blip in form.
“I gave them a pep talk and said they have got to start shooting,” he said. “Have you seen ugly men walking around with a very beautiful wife? Well that’s because they’ve asked 30, 40, 50 times before getting a ‘yes’.
“On the other hand, you’ll see a handsome man ask once, get a ‘no’ in response and that’s it. So the more you try, the more success you’ll have. We need a lot more goal attempts, we’ll score more and win games.”
Thanks Vincent.