If you’re reading this, chances are you weren’t born the last time Arsenal won a major piece of silverware. Back then, Adam Ant was top of the charts, Argentina had just invaded the Falklands, and Jimmy Saville was “fixing it” for scores of “lucky” youngsters up and down Britain.
OK, maybe it wasn’t that long ago, but if you’re a regular BBM reader, then chances are you at least have the mental age of someone who wasn’t born the last time Arsenal won a trophy that didn’t have the words “Longest Serving Manager” engraved on the side.
But what’s this? Could it be true? Have Arsenal really been given the cup-equivalent of an open goal after being pitted against Hull in this year’s FA Cup final on 17th May? Well considering how much effort it took for them to see off Championship team Wigan in the semi-final, we perhaps wouldn’t take victory for granted, but considering they’ve already beaten Hull twice this season – including a 3-0 away spanking last month – we don’t think Mrs Doubtfire’s team of would-be tigers will be too troubling for Arsene Wenger’s touring shop window of talented youngsters. Especially as Hull will be without two of their main strikers – Nikica Jelavic and Shane Long, who are both cup-tied.
“We have got through to the cup final without them,” said Mrs Doubtfire (AKA Steve Bruce). “There is no doubt that they gave us something extra at the top end of the pitch so we will have to find a way to work without them.”
Meanwhile, Wenger is truly getting into the cup spirit by issuing the traditional “the cup is different to the league” cry beloved of obvious-statement-making top four managers for the last two decades.
“The Cup final is a completely different game,” Wenger parroted while dusting off Arsenal’s trophy cabinet.
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